Money Trouble: You Are Worth Less Than Your Money

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Ok, so this mindset is a major problem child and surprisingly common among my clients. I love helping to dig this one out, maybe because this is the big one I struggled with myself.

I lived in hand-me-downs most of my life. I duct taped my “talking shoes” so I could make them last longer. I even wore my husband’s old t-shirts and sweat pants and my old maternity clothes (when I wasn’t pregnant) so I wouldn’t “waste money” on clothes for myself. I was quick to take my children to the pediatrician, but I “couldn’t afford” a therapist, even when I recognized I was NOT doing well. I mowed our lawn each week, hugely pregnant with a baby on my hip and back, because hiring a sitter or someone to mow meant I was “lazy or incapable.” True story. I couldn’t bring myself to reach out to a marriage therapist when we needed one, because the price of the therapist and the childcare felt insurmountable.

I blamed a lot of my inability to take care of myself on my tight budget. But the truth is, I believed my money had more worth than me. I didn’t feel worthy to spend my money on things that beautified my life unless I could prove how the money would be returned or multiplied.

The reasons for this belief are complicated and multi-sourced as most negative messaging is, but I did not think my behavior was from a negative place. I thought I was being frugal and financially responsible; I was sacrificing to get ahead. While it IS necessary to make sacrifices to become successful, a biblical “long-suffering” is not the same as financial martyrdom.

There are extremes to every behavior. A sacrifice is when you give up something good to receive or create something better. It does not mean to neglect or starve people physically, emotionally, or psychologically to save a buck. That includes you and your important relationships!

Do you see yourself or you partner in my story?

Deep down, do you:

1. feel the spouse who brings in less money has a lower true financial contribution and not worthy of the money that is brought in.

2. believe it is unwise to invest in education (formal or informal) or self-care that doesn’t clearly increase the paycheck right away?

3. neglect/underserve your own or your family member’s spiritual, physical, mental, or emotional self-care because the cost feels irresponsible?

It is wise and responsible to invest your money in things that produce an increase, yes. But do you realize that YOU are the greatest investment? Your mind, your body, and your relationships ARETHEREASONS God put you here on earth. They produce the greatest, most worthy increase. Why would the care and development of those not be PRIORITY in your budget??

“For where your treasure is, there will your heart be also.” Matt 6:21

Are you budgeting and spending on the things that protect and create growth, abundance, and joy in your life, relationships, and your future?

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Published by Ruth Liebel

I am a mother of 4, wife of a surgeon and soldier, girl of the Southwest but I love The South. I am a formally educated financial counselor and a Ramsey Preferred Coach. I love my work and want to empower others to live abundantly through budget, boundaries, and beliefs. What can I help you accomplish today?